A goodbye letter to my breasts – GUEST BLOG by Nevo Zisin
Today’s blog has been written by a young friend of mine. Tomorrow he will undergo ‘top surgery’ as another step on his journey to becoming the man he knows himself to be.
To my breasts, Firstly, I want to say I’m sorry. I tried really hard to make it work, and I know you did too. But I’m afraid it was just never meant to be. I think we spent a lot of time and effort trying to get along and feeling upset when it didn’t work out, and even though I believe we could have saved a lot of time if we hadn’t tried so hard, I’m glad it happened, because I think it’s gotten us to this point where we can part on good terms. I really do see you as a friend and I know you never intentionally tried to hurt me. I know it was hard for you to see how much pain I was in as a result of your presence sometimes, but I want you to know it wasn’t your fault. You did everything you could. You got smaller, you even grew some hairs so that maybe I would feel less uncomfortable about you, you cooperated with me when I put you into constricting positions that I’m sure you didn’t enjoy. And I really do appreciate everything you did. Honestly, I’ll probably miss you. I think I tried to convince myself for a long time that I wouldn’t and that it would just be easier to hate you, but I’m not sure I can do that anymore. I don’t hate you, I respect you, we’ve been through a lot together. I know it was hard for both of us when we were younger and started getting told to cover up. I know we’ve always been confused as to why we can’t go out in public together. I know that you’ve had your own challenges within yourself, being asymmetrical was hard for you growing up and I know I wasn’t always the most supportive about it. I need you to know that I’m not saying goodbye because I don’t love you. I think we’ve just gotten to this point where we need to move on. And I know this is probably hard for you to hear, but I do believe I’ll be happier without you. I also think this will be better for you. You need to be free and I’m just going to keep holding you back and pushing you down. It’s time to separate. So please know that I will miss you. And I’ll probably think about you from time to time. And I’m grateful that I had you in my life as long as I did, because you presented me with challenges that made me grow and develop as a person. Good luck for the future, and I hope you can forgive and understand. Lots of love and respect, Nevo
Nevo is a 19-year-old activist who dedicates much of his life to being a role model and mentoring children. As well as being a leader in a Jewish youth movement, Nevo is an advocate in regards to issues relating to gender and sexuality. He also identifies as transgender. For Nevo, this meant a social and medical transition from the gender he was assigned at birth, which was female. As a child, Nevo presented as masculine and for many years told people he was a boy and would correct others if they referred to him with a feminine pronoun. Nevo came out as a lesbian at the age of 14 and 3 years later began to feel a level of discomfort in the way society perceived him and how he was associating with his body. He began hormone-replacement therapy while overseas on an Israel program and is now a contact point in the Jewish community for other children and families confronting issues of gender and sexuality in their own lives. Nevo also bring a unique perspective into gender inequality as he has experienced society’s treatment through presenting both as female and male.